Trans what? Transmission? Oh, that trans!

Transgender!

T.J. Rockford

  We as in a human civilized species have come a long way from where we had started! With any luck our future possible president won't drag us back to the stone ages where segregation was an accepted practice! Or where being gay was a close held secret, never mind speaking words such as transgender! 

  Speaking for myself over the years I have become very open to the ways of the world and the difference among each, and every individual, whether of a persons skin color being more vibrant then my bland white, Or how about a persons genetic make up? Should that be mine to judge? 

  I have come to realize things aren't as, cut and dry, as some would like you to believe! As was the way of the era I had grown up in through the 70's and 80's As it was really the time of revelations being made or at least in the works!

  I had grown up at a time where the generation before me still held their strong beliefs towards every type of issue that is nowadays no longer issue's but more like the way of life, and how I feel life should be! Or at least a growing number of us!

  I believe if two people love each other no matter what their gender, Race, Religion, Or planet they hail from, god bless em'! All the best because if two people can come together and find a form of enlightenment with one and other have at it! 

  I'm personally jealous of all that are free enough to not be ashamed of who, or what they are, and are able to find happiness! 

  As I mentioned the era I had grown up in, with the type of so called "family values," with Ronald Reagan as president and his beloved wife Nancy, and her die hard commitment to re-establishing what family values were supposed to be all about according to her! 

  If I recall correctly most of those values sure didn't hit topics of gay pride or transgender value's!

I do know she sure did ruin what was, and should of been on t.v.! 

  Nancy was pretty much stuck on what she considered the all American Christian Values! No drinking, deadly against drugs, Sex of any kind was a topic shoved somewhere in the closet probably right beside all the gay people hiding in there as well!

  It to me was a tough time considering during those times in the early and mid 80's I was a teenager, and I was to young to really enjoy any of that free love fucking hippie shit from the 70's! (Sid Vicious famous saying) and we were tossed right into a state of identity confusion!

  Clothing style's were way wacked out! Hair style's I won't even go there because I just learned a few years ago a mullet wasn't cool!

  Never mind having feelings or an identity issue that you couldn't, or were to ashamed to share! Sure there were particular areas where things were a bit more open to the gay community such as San Francisco! But then again you have to remember this was the time of Aids being an epidemic and we were thought to believe it was due to the gay community!

  I actually was directly impacted and affected by the fact I had a male gay cousin that passed to Aids! So I understand and felt the need I had to rethink my ways of being brought up, and what is right, wrong, or just isn't anybody else's business! Because I consider it all to be the way of LIFE!

  I wish I could of found what so many others have, and that is being comfortable in your own skin! 

  I am not saying I'm gay, though if I were it would be no difference. Because of the way I was brought up I'm like ashamed of everything!

  I'm told I'm a good looking guy,and yes I've had this said to me by both men and women! Sexually I prefer women though I'm terrible at any kind of beginning interactions with them! In all honesty I would be better off as a gay man just because of this wicked anxiety and awkwardness I have with my opposite sex! 

  So needless to say at 46 I still haven't been fortunate enough to achieve what so many others have that are comfortable in their own skin have, And that is finding true love!

  

  I have been married and do have grown children but it was a marriage due to circumstance! Yup a pregnant circumstance! I was brought up in that era where you should do the right thing despite what your heart might want, or need!

  My own parents stayed together until my sister and I were grown and gone before finally divorcing due to falling out of love, but felt committed to staying together for the family!  

  I look at them and all the years of loved missed, lost, wasted I dunno? I do know I have always been a creature that has always had this burning desire to find true love and share these times I envision of sailing to beautiful places and sharing experiences while embracing someone in a sunset you wished would last forever! Even a nice glass of wine sitting in utter silence with another but being able to feel that word love!

  With all these views of how people imagine the world should be according to their thoughts and ideas or religious beliefs, All I can see is how these people have wasted their live's much like my mother and father, and even myself! 

  Over the years I have had a reawakening and I see things through a clear pair of glasses instead of glasses of many colors!

  I see people that I know in my heart, that even though they may have features that say they look like their supposed to be a certain way, by no means at all should they be, in mind, heart, or physical appearance!

  For those people that maybe can't afford the surgery, Or for what ever reasons, I do believe everyone should have what we all have, or at least should have, and this is dignity! Such as the dignity to use a restroom that properly defines who you are! Imagine a world  where you can use a facility without being embarrassed or ashamed of where and who you are!

  I heard this tape of a women on a rant at a Target store that had just opened a transgender bathroom. This women was on a rip roaring tear of saying things like these men are perverts! Which she of course had to stereotype it to it just being a mans issue! 

  This woman had gone on and on of this is why America is failing, and it's the devil's work! When in all reality she is the reason this country is failing and she sounded more like the demon she was spewing on about! She is stuck wearing a pair of colored lens glasses that should have been changed way before now!

  We cannot change our inner soul, the machine that makes us who we are! We can try to fake our way through our existence by everyday living the same lie, because of others and fears of acceptance! 

  Or of the feeling of needing to do what is the right thing according to the way we were programmed at a young age! In which it only destroys out inner soul, and that machine of which who we are starts to break down under the crushing weight and it's not only an identity that gets lost in time and space, but a real life human being that is capable of loving and capable of being loved! It is not what we are that define's us, But more like who we are and what we're able to become!  

  It seems to me it would be just more senseless loss, Like the loss of a love that this world has so blindly used, abused, and wasted on self righteous behaviors! We have substituted the word love for doing a good deed! Maybe we should start a new word "Transcumbobulated!" Maybe this is where most of the world is stuck in!

  Two more words that start with "trans" is "Transfusion" and "Transformation!" Both of these words describe what this world is in serious need of! And in countless way's!